Your Weekly Wildcat school lunch newsletter from President Barack Obama
Kids your age often ask me what’s the best part about being President. Is it riding in motorcades or Air Force One? Playing basketball with my Secret Service agents? I don’t know about the other presidents, but for me the best part is what I’m doing right now – writing your weekly school lunch menu. I take my constitutional duties as America’s School Nutritionist-in-Chief very seriously, and it’s important to me that all of you get the healthy meals you’ll need to grow up strong and start paying your fair share.
For America to remain competitive in the future, kids like you will need to shape up and cut out the sugary soft drinks and junk food like chips, pizza, and Tater Tots. But a healthy lunchtime can also be delicious – and fun-ucational! This week’s menu theme is “Friends Around the World.” Every day we’ll be taking a “food-venture” to a different country around the globe, so fasten your seatbelts and bring your appetite!
MONDAY
Low fat Sweet & Sour chicken, steamed vegetables, whole grain rice, caffeine-free unsweetened tea
Did you guess Monday’s delicious & healthy mystery cuisine? That’s right! It’s Chinese, just like my good friend President Hu Jintao. Who? Hu, that’s who! He dropped by my house for dinner recently, where we talked about our many challenging debt problems – and how generations of American kids like you will be helping solve them. Remember to bring $5 for authentic chopsticks!
TUESDAY
Hummus, falafel, tabouli, yogurt ayran
On Tuesday we say “open sesame” to the delicious healthy cuisine of our peace-loving friends in the Middle East. That exciting region has been in the news a lot recently, especially Egypt. This week we learned that ancient land is much more than just pyramids and mummies – it’s also a place where people get disappointed when they lose their internet connection. While you are enjoying lunch, talk with your friends about Egyptian current events. Who are the ‘good guys’? Who are the ‘bad guys’? What should I do? When you have an answer, write an essay and send it to me. You might win an all- expense-paid diplomacy trip with my State Department team!
WEDNESDAY
Free range turkey taco salad, pinto beans, fresh salsa, naturally sweetened limeade
On “Miercoles,” let’s go “South of the ‘border’” for a fiesta with our amigos from Mexico! But remember – delicious spicy food isn’t the only thing America imports from our good neighbors next door. We also get natural resources, manufactured goods, specialty medicines… and millions and millions of new Americans! Mexican food is also popular in our southwestern border states like Arizona, where a crazed Republican gunman recently shot many people after listening to talk radio.
THURSDAY
Organic borscht, boiled fish, kvass
Strap in, cosmonauts! Thursday we hop in the time machine and travel back to those Fabulous Fifties - when your grandparents were “rocking and rolling” and “ducking and covering” under their school desks. Back then, they were caught by surprise when the Soviets (what we used to call Russia) launched Sputnik, the first space satellite. How did the Soviets leap to the lead in the space race? History tells us it was because the Soviets had brilliant and determined public servants who weren’t afraid to try “big things.” And because unlike 1950’s Americans, they avoided gas-guzzling fast cars and fatty drive-in fare like cheeseburgers, fries and milkshakes. So have a “Sputnik moment” and enjoy a taste of what made the USSR the envy of the postwar world!
FRIDAY
Classes canceled for scheduled teacher’s strike
Just because you’re at home doesn’t mean you can’t continue to eat a healthy lunch. Ask your parents to prepare a low-fat meal featuring plenty of fresh fruits and vegetables. And while you’re at it, remind them to support the new state bond issue to fund the teacher’s union pension plan. Unless they want you eating lunch at home next week too!
