A little tidying up after the gala art contest from last week. Mixed in among the various bribe offers (including a case of Old Style, $33.17, Pinta pomegranate tequila, a Nobel Peace Prize, and two offers of sex - one possibly from a female) were a load of late entries which might have been strong prize contenders had their creators not been procrastinators. I offer them for your enjoyment herewith:
Entry #98 "Kiss Me Son of God" by Dr. Wu The mysterious Dr Wu of Mr. Moto's Diary sends his nifty video set to the music of They Might Be Giants. A full size version can be seen here. |
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Entry #97 "Creation of Iowahawk by the Flying Spaghetti Monster" by Larry Reisinger "Very bad art," says the humble Mr. Reisinger, "but the message counts, right?" |
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Entry #96 "I Changed a Color" by Herr Morgenholz "Hey, I changed a color," says the artist. "See if you can find it." | |
Entry #95 "Iowahawk Sphinx" by Leslie Eastman The artist, who blogs at the Egyptian-themed Temple of Mut, pictures Iowahawk the ancient edifice of the desert, yet inscrutably leaves the nose on. | |
When you’re troubled by your knee, call Barack Obama! You’ll see the Doc he tells you to see, Barack Obama! Barack Obama! He’s our Doctor in Chief! All you need is belief! We will all be healed by Barack Obama! Dictators love our finest man, Barack Obama! He’ll always extend his open hand, Barack Obama! Barack Obama! He has no need for victory, When it comes to jihadis! Forget the Israelis; we love Obama! His touch can heal the Mullahs’ evil intent, The Planet will forgive us for that cowboy president…Barack Obama! He will stop evil climate change, he’s Obama! Pay your fair share, it’s all the rage, Barack Obama! Barack Obama! This global warming period, Cannot withstand his mind and love! Our green savior from above, Barack Obama! The oceans will recede now that he is president. The trees will hug you back because they love you…Barack Obama Ring my friend I said you call Barack Obama Ring my friend at 3 a.m. you might get Obama (fade out) Barack Obama! |
Entry #94 "Barack Obama" by Patrick Burke A lyrical parody in 4/4 time set to the tune of "Dr. Robert," a neat little nugget from the Beatles catalog. |
Entry #93 "Iowahawk Green Machine" by John Barrett Kinetic 18 wheel sculpture in chrome and diesel smoke. | |
O beautiful for spacious lies,
For amber waves of grain, When brewed with purple-tipp-ed hops, Lead only unto pain! I-o-wa-hawk! I-o-wa-hawk! God shed His grace on thee, I hope you get the help you need, Lest “you” turn into “we”! O beautiful for Goodyear’s feet, Whose stern impassioned stress, Lay miles of rubber down the streets, Across the wilderness! I-o-wa-hawk! I-o-wa-hawk! God mend thine every flaw, He knows you got no self-control, No re-spect for the law! O beautiful horsepower proves, Gears clashing out in strife, Who more than you your country loves? ‘Cause speed is freedom’s life! I-o-wa-hawk! I-o-wa-hawk! May God thy goals refine, The Heavn’ly tree of flashing lights, Leads to the Finish Line! O beautiful for patriot’s dreams, You see beyond the years, Thine quarter-panels’ red-flames’ gleams, Undimmed by human tears! I-o-wa-hawk! I-o-wa-hawk! God shed His grace on thee, As you race across this land, From sea to shining sea! O, hal-u-cin-o-gen-ic skies, Too many waves of grain, Metallic candy-apple red, Across the enameled plain! I-o-wa-hawk! I-o-wa-hawk, God shed His grace on thee, Till paint wax fair as earth and air, And metal-flak-ed sea! O beautiful for Goodyear’s feet, Whose stern impassioned stress, Lay miles of rubber down the streets, Across the wilderness! I-o-wa-hawk! I-o-wa-hawk! God shed His grace on thee, ‘Till paths be burned through, Trophies earned, By heel-and-toe and knee! O beautiful for glory-tales, Of speed’s eternal strife, When once and twice, To no avail, You risked your very life! I-o-wa-hawk! I-o-wa-hawk, God shed His grace on thee, ‘Till selfish gains no longer stain, The banner of the free! O beautiful for patriot’s dreams, You see beyond the years, In rear-view mir’r, your smile gleams, Undimmed by human tears! I-o-wa-hawk! I-o-wa-hawk, God shed His grace on thee, Until your final red-line comes…. And ends your jubilee!
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Entry #92 "The Iowahawk the Beautiful" by Michael Bixby Dudley A stirring anthem whose only flaw is not enough stanzas. |
Entry #91 "His Master's Voice" by Joe Whelan More Emerald City photoshoppery from the twisted mind behind 'Acornholio' (see entry #46) | |
I didn't bother to enter the contest
And would you please throw in a And the house is clean, too.
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Entry #90 "Rationale for Art Prize" by LBF |