Bon Voyage
So long, suckers! I'm headed back to Paris tomorrow to finally collect on fabulous internet riches. Parisian pal Professor Jonathan writes:
Assalaamu'alaikum Brother Burge! Greetings!
I am Dr. Professor Jonathan seeking to discuss business matters of the highest importance in Paris, France. I saw your intention of coming here while browsing through the internet so I decided to contact you hoping you can be trusted to handle this matter and not betray me like Mr. Reginald D. Sludge of Petaluma California who ran away with my late father's US$8.8Million when the funds was transferred to his account and changed his location and phone number!
Till this moment I have not been able to locate him. Please i contact you in good faith and clean heart so i want you to let me trust you to be able to handle this deal for me and on my behalf. I have an inherited US$25,000,000.00 plus 150 Kilos of Alluvial Gold Dust deposited with a reputable Savings & Loan Bank in Newark New Jersey by my late father and I need your assistance to claim it from the bank and have it transferred to your bank account.
I will offer you 30% of the total amount and 5 kilos of the gold and also come over to your country to invest the balance of everything in your country or any part of the world based on your professional advise and also kindly furnish me with the following details:
1. Your Full Name.......................................
2. Bank Account Details.............................................................
3. Where You Keep Keys To Coupe of Justice.......Thanks and remain blessed. In awaiting our Business Meeting in Paris,
Dr. Professor Jonathan
Paris France
If you'd like to meet me and the good Professor in Montparnasse Thursday night for alcohol and to discuss this incredible business opportunity, drop me an email at the link to your left. I mean a gauche.
Media News
First, the Australian newspapers. Then, the Weekly Standard. Now my secret plan for worldwide media domination has reached Phase III: America's radio airwaves! Celebrated rat-munching Watergate superstar and talk show host G. Gordon Liddy recently performed my latest Canadian radioplay. If you'd like to have a listen, click here and tell 'em 'hawk sent you.
Sticky Situation
New bumper stickers for the Burge-Goldstein presidential campaign! Reader Randall Phillips sends these two for your consideration. More stickers here. Great for showing your patriotism and hiding those unsightly chrome blemishes!
Reading is Fun-damental
What are you still doing here? Head on over to Bolus for ripping yarns, including new paintblogging from Coop (possibly NSFW), a Floyd Clymer retrospective from Noteboom (possibly NSFW), and car show blogging from yours truly. Plus: fresh balls daily!
