iowahawk: Bonneville '07

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Bonneville '07

Okay, one last Bonneville post until next year. Regular garbage resumes soon.

Blurbs

Glenn Reynolds (Instapundit)
"All I can say to IowaHawk is, 'We're not worthy'"
Charles Johnson (Little Green Footballs)
"Iowahawk is some kinda damn genius"
Tim Blair
"...more cool than is healthy for any human... he is from deep space"
Thomas Lifson (The American Thinker)
"Now more than ever. America needs Iowahawk"
Patterico
"...the guy is a comic genius"
Allahpundit
"profane... bloodthirsty... hilarious"
Spongeworthy
"But no shit, Iowahawk might get up tomorrow, get baked, grab his beautiful wife and ride his moped backwards to a Hells Angel rally, then drink himself into oblivion and fight about 7 crank dealers from the Racine chapter of the Death Jokers all by himself. Then maybe he'd go home, romance the beautiful wife, build a perfect retro treehouse for his perfect kids, drink a bottle of tequila, prepare a 3-course meal while beating away a push-in home invader and sacrificing him on a makeshift, though historically accurate, Inca altar he built in the woods behind the railroad tracks. Then he'd sit down and knock out a tremedously insulting Leftist parody that pissed off thread after thread of Kos and DU lunatics, romance the bride once again and fall asleep chuckling. It's like he's Paul Bunyan and Mark Twain rolled up into one hipster"
Bill Whittle
"I've met him, you know -- Iowahawk. 6'7" he is, arms like mighty oak trees, legs like even mightier oak trees: clear grey eyes looking to the far horizon, his lantern jaw set against the approaching storm but yet with a slight hint of a distant smile bourne of many combats won and mortal enemies vanquished. I stood speechless in his presence at a restaurant in Marina del Rey --- just speechless, weeping silently at the sheer magnetism and force of personality coming off the man in seismic waves; a transcendental, religious experience that kept me awake for a week, as if I had seen the heavens split open in a blaze of orange and purple glory, and all of God's Great Plan revealed. And when he finally did speak, it was the sound of distant thunder echoing off ancient mountains, a sound that predates mankind's puny schreeching -- a sound that, indeed, is antecedent to the founding of Life on Earth and comes carried through the ether on the shock wave of ancient dying stars. And though he only spoke twelve words during the four hours I stood in his presence, those words are with me still, a perfect dozen seared into my memory, written in gold across the great hall of my mind. He said, 'HEY, CAN YOU GET THIS ONE? I LEFT MY WALLET AT HOME.'"
Jim Treacher
"I don't LIKE you. I LOVE you. In a GAY way."
Mark Steyn
"I take my hat off. This belongs to a very select group of Jokes I Wish I'd Thought Of First: 'It's that time of year when we honor the ultimate MILF: Mother Earth'"
James Waterton (Samizdata)
"bloody magnificent... Is there a Nobel prize for comedy? If not, we damn well need one"
Blackfive
"This pipe-smokin' assassin is the pure ass heat"
Michelle Malkin
"Iowahawk brings the funny"
Roger Kimball (The New Criterion)
"The excellent weblog IowaHawk summarized some of the thoughts I had... I must also laud David Burge of IowaHawk for his gritty pragmatism. He is no armchair crusader, full of empty imprecations."
Blog Québécois
"If Iowahawk ever decides to turn his guns on you, accept your beating with good grace and a rueful chuckle. If you try to fight back, it only gets funnier."
Rand Simberg (Transterrestrial Musings)
"Next time Iowahawk beats up on you, just take it. If you try to fight back, it only gets worse. It's like one of those monsters that, the harder you fight it, the stronger it gets, because it actually feeds on your pathetic swats."
Dr. Melissa Clouthier
"Most bloggers would lose a bar room brawl. There are exceptions."
Daily Kos commentors
"The new McCarthyism... F***ing pr***. Now go cry to momma" ... “just punch the stupid f***er out"..."shut [his] f***ing mouth while I'm pummelling him"..."me & my brick in a dark alley"... "sharpen your knives"... "“maybe [he] will consider the possibility of getting a shot in the teeth”
Right Wing Bob
"Iowahawk remains probably the most versatile purveyor of America - boosting depravity on the scene today"
James Taranto (Wall St Journal's Best of the Web)
"the best way to respond to this sort of thing is with mockery, as blogger Iowahawk... devastatingly does"
Dean Barnett (HughHewitt.com)
"The reigning comic genius of the blogosphere"
Gerard Van der Leun (Pajamas Media)
"The Master of Disaster... Where else on the web can you channel-surf the spirits of Mark Twain and Big Daddy Roth on the same page?"
State 29
"The King of all Insightful Vulgarness"
Jonah Goldberg (National Review Online)
"Very Funny... Much profanity, natch"
The Weekly Standard
"Fantastic and profane parody"
Deep Thought Blog
"Possibly the funniest blogger on Earth"
Michael Malone (ABC News 'Silicon Insider')
"The great Web satirist"
Blacklake (Hot Air Comments)
"I’d say Iowahawk was a genius, but geniuses aren’t generally very clever. Plus, studies have shown that nine out of ten have no idea how to clean a carb. So, statistically speaking, his geniushood is unlikely."
Lawrence Henry, American Spectator
"The Internet humor champ"
Free Counterpoint
"This man is brilliant."
Dan Collins (Protein Wisdom)
"I pretty much suck Iowahawk's d***"
Banzai Aphrodite
"Iowahawk reminds me why I love blogs"
Robert Spencer (Jihad Watch)
"marvelously dead-on"
Little Miss Attila
"Iowahawk's the kind of guy you'd want to run into in that alternate universe. You know: the one in which no one is married, and the bars stay open all night"
Manolo (Manolo's Shoe Blog)
"You are indeed super fantastic!"
Zombie (ZombieTime)
"Iowahawk is the most underpaid man in America"
Power Line
"Amazing"
Balagan
"Le blog américain Iowahawk, qui traite l'actualité par la dérision, a transposé les évènements du Moyen Orient dans le Midwest américain en jouant sur le fait que Mideast veut dire Moyen Orient"
Panikowsky
"А вот сатирическая издевка по мотивам..."
EU Referendum
"superlative... wonderfully funny"
Procurando Vagas
"Todo ano o site Iowahawk promove um concurso bem diferente, o Miss Presidiária, onde você escolhe a condenada mais bonita dos EUA do ano... Mais vamos ajudar a patricinha e dar uma força, porque ela merece"
Adam Smith Institute UK
"Tom Lehrer was wrong, satire is not dead yet."
House of Dumb
"Fortunately, there's always Iowahawk to give us that 'last cigarette in front of the firing squad' feeling"
Hugh Hewitt
"2008's Christopher Walken... bad news"
Instapundit
"Iowahawk for President: he's got my vote!"
Karl Maher
"Dave Burge can read the terrorists' minds!"
בצל טוב (Good Onion - Israel)
אמנם היה קיץ והזרימה חלשה יותר, וגם ההצקות של זבובוני החול זה לא משהו שאפשר להתעלם ממנו, אבל באמת היה סיור יפה (הרבה מחיאות כפיים, צעיר ערבי שהכרתי וגו’).
The Sophistry
"One of the best writers in the world."
chasovschik
"Iowahawk представляет впечатляющую коллекцию антикварных сельскохозяйственных приборов"
Hog on Ice
"Might as well not exist"
The Intertubes
"Iowahawk must be one of the awesomest pack-rats ever"
Boing Boing
"Our pal"
AutoBlog
"a very cool blogger"
Los Boulevardos
"Facts: 1) I think blogs are gay. 2) That dude has a rad blog."
Ryan Cochran, The Jalopy Journal
"Good pal and loon"
Hugh Hewitt
"My turn on the Iowahawk carving board."
Ace (Ace of Spades HQ)
"trust Iowahawk to bring the funny"
Washington Times
"Objectively hilarious"
The McMuffins (UK)
"Iowahawk and his lovely wife... did not appear to be the psychopathic stalking killers we had been warned about, although that Iowahawk did have a murderous look in his eyes and an unusual amount of froth coming from his mouth"
Paul Kedrosky (Infectious Greed)
"I really don't know how best to summarize IowaHawk's you-are-there white-trash treatise... If you crossed Hunter Thompson and Michael Lewis, you might get something this angry and bizarre"
Wat Tyler (Burning Our Money UK)
"brilliant and scary insight"
Mary Katherine Ham
"Hands down the best damn roadkill-centric caucus coverage you'll read"
Ace (Ace of Spades HQ)
"Fucking brilliant... Well played, Iowahawk"
Mark Steyn
"Meticulous... one man investigative unit"
National Review Media Blog
"Hilarious"
Sissy Willis
"should be required reading for all students planning a 'career' in journalism"
Power Line
"Iowahawk deserves a Pulitzer"
Roger Kimball (Pajamas Media)
"inspired … I was going to say 'parody,' but really it is far too close to the original to be called a parody. Really, it is like the play Hamlet stages to 'catch the conscience of the King,' a dramatic re-enactment of the very crime Claudius had committed but had yet to acknowledge. It worked for Hamlet; will Iowahawk’s performance work for the rest of us? It is too early to tell. But ... it is more truthful, and far more amusing, than anything you’ll read in the [New York] Times."
Lone Star Times
"Between cleaning carburetors and restoring classic American cars, Burge churns out some of the funniest and decisively deadly wit and commentary on the web... Write the Pulitzer Committee and demand Iowahawk should win"
Zürcher Presseverein (Switzerland)
"Dies eine Schlagzeile der US-Stiftung «Media Violence Project». Die Journalisten die hinter diesem Projekt stehen, möchten die amerikanische Öffentlichkeit aufrütteln und die Massen bezüglich Gewalt gegen Journalistinnen und Journalisten sensibilisieren. Hier findet man diverse Plakate und Sujets der Stiftung."
National Association of Manufacturers
"Widely ~~respected~~ feared"
Midwest Conservative Journal
"It's Iowahawk's world. He just lets the rest of us live in it"
Jules Crittenden (Boston Herald)
"Iowahawk needs to quit screwing around and just change his name to Geniushawk"
Melanie Philips (Spectator UK)
"too good not to share"
Rod Dreher (Crunchy Con)
"inimitable... absolutely brilliant satire"
Document.no (Norway)
"Som alltid leverer Iowahawk varene, denne gangen i form av en oppgradering av Chaucer i anledning erkebiskop Rowan Williams' sharia-uttalelser. Dette må være det morsomste som hittil er publisert i blogosfæren"
Rachel Lucas
"brilliant... Awesomeness"
Scott Johnson (Power Line)
"Virtuoso"
Public Secrets
"Sheer genius"
Resurrection Song
"Good Lord, that's nifty...may not be the coolest thing ever in the ‘sphere, but it must be close... read and marvel at the wonder"
David Freddoso (The Corner on Nation Review Online)
"Now this is funny... brilliant rendering"
Lone Star Times
"Only a hotrod fanatic from the cornfields of Iowa could concoct such a literary masterpiece"
Peter Breedveld - Frontaal Naakt (Netherlands)
"Speciaal voor de aartsbisschop van Canterbury deze geheel vernieuwde politiekincorrecte versie van de Canterbury Tales van de Amerikaanse blogger Iowahawk. Vooral de fraaie strofe 'everybody muste get stoned' zal de eerwaarde sharia-supporter uit het hart gegrepen zijn"
Patrick O'Hannigan - The American Spectator
"Brilliant"
Ruth Gledhill - Times of London
"utterly brilliant"
Amused Cynic
"...should be put in the National Archives next to the Declaration of Independence in the special nuclear bomb-proof case... Funniest thing I’ve ever read"
Matt Hayden (Australia)
"Bloke's a comedy god, I reckon"
CathCon
"This is the funniest material I have ever read on the internet"
Jakarta Blok M (Indonesia)
"5 bintangs on the 'Revometer'"
Dr. Melissa Clouthier
"Did I mention that I love Iowahawk? Because I do. He's such a manly blogger and I'd like to meet him because he' funny and has a rotten streak. I like men with a rotten streak."
Michelle Malkin
"brilliant"
Andrew Bolt (Melbourne Herald Sun, Australia)
"Great skills"
Tim Blair
"crazy bastard"
Michael Goldfarb (Weekly Standard)
"masterpiece"
Joseph Bottum (First Things)
"I’m on the board of a literary magazine at a small state university, and, at the board’s meeting this spring, the editor mentioned that he had wanted to reprint the blogger Iowahawk’s hilarious swipe at the archbishop of Canterbury... Unfortunately, the editor said, the magazine couldn’t do reprint it. The legal adviser from the university’s administration had said no—not on the grounds that it was offensive to Anglicans and their archbishop, but on the grounds that it mentioned Islam, and the school could receive bomb threats as a result of publishing it."
Kilátás a karosszékből (Hungary)
A sikerhez viszont az is kell, hogy David H. Petraeus tábornokot egy megfelelő stylistcsapat vegye a szárnyai alá, mert ahogy kinézett a kongresszusi meghallgatáson, az valami rettenetes – szól Matthew DeBord megsemmisítő ítélete. Én zokogtam...
Jeff Goldstein (Protein Wisdom)
"Funny? This dude wouldn't know funny if it sidled up next to him at a barn razing and stuck it's nipple in his ear. "-- But that doesn't mean he isn't earnest..."
Physics Geek
"Good thing that Iowahawk exists: otherwise, we'd have to invent him"
Artblog
"delivers the coup de grace"
Jules Crittendon
"as usual Iowahawk’s unrelenting, merciless and cruel mockery [is] clear evidence that even at this late date, the old gods yet walk among us and would toy with us"
Barcepundit (Spain)
"Pure genius"
Rachel Lucas
"evil genius"
Michelle Malkin
"You almost can’t parody this mess... but Iowahawk can and does so again brilliantly"
Maggie's Farm
"If Iowahawk ever calls, and says: Road trip!, never say no"
The Great Satan
"luckiest man alive"
Gudmundson (Sweden)
"Glimrande elaka Jenny Westerstrand kanske aspirerar på att bli en ny Iowahawk, vad vet jag. Bra satir är det hur som helst för lite av i bloggosfären"

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