The good folks at like-minded satire site I Own The World hold a periodic thematic humor competition for their readers, with prize winners determined by an invited guest celebrity blogger. I am delighted to announce that I received an email last week inviting me to judge their latest competition. I of course immediately accepted this wonderful honor; upon which I received another message from IOTW rescinding their original invitation, explaining how it was an unintentional accident caused by some sort of email virus.
Now, as you all know, I am not one who misses out on a chance for large quantities of cheap blog traffic. So I wrote back to IOTW and appealed to their sense of fair play. I explained how my highly developed aesthetic sensibilities and impeccable literary taste made me the ideal candidate for the job. When that failed, I had my lawyer (famed blogosphere plaintiff's attorney Sheldon "Hotlink" Grubniewski) explain for them the ugly financial consequences of their ill-considered breach of contract.
In the end, reason prevailed, and I once again accepted their offer. The theme of IOTW's latest contest is "One Letter Change Movies," which generated over 500 entries, each with their own unique charm. After careful scientific scrutiny -- and two bottles of Night Train fortified grape beverage -- I am ready to render my final judgment.
Maestro, drum roll please:
Third Runner Up, from LoveItOrLeaveIt:
"Legally Bland: The story of the restaurant industry in N.Y."
Second Runner Up, from niteowl:
"Ferris Bueler's Pay Off: A slacker student cuts classes to campaign for Obama, and is rewarded with a college education forcibly extracted from unwilling taxpayers."
First Runner Up, from Nice Deb:
"Bang the Frum Slowly: Conservative pundits take turns verbally pummeling a whiny, RINO douchebag, the latest being R. Emmitt Tyrrell."
Congeniality Award, to borhome for:
"Scareface: the Nancy Pelosi biopic"
And the Grand Champion, from Chalupa:
"Dr. Zhicago: A community organizer is torn between two lovers – Karl Marx and Joseph Stalin."
Congratulations to the winners!
And to the also-rans who are now foolishly considering a class action suit for being overlooked: I still have Hotlink Grubniewski on retainer.