A number of people have written asking if I have anything to say about the now-famous 1970's party pics of our President-Elect, namely:
The one word answer is "no." The thousand-word explanation is:
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Yep, lurking behind that molester mustache is your host at age 15. And sadly, it is probably my most flattering / least incriminating teenage photograph.Have any similarly mortifying, presidential-aspiration-killing pictures from your youth (preferably circa 1970-1990)? Send 'em in and I'll broadcast your shame to a waiting world.
Go ahead, I dare ya. I double dog dare ya.
UPDATE: Steve Carlson is a brave, brave man. He sends this picture of himself, circa 1970, thumbs akimbo and beaming with pride at his swanky new striped ensemble.
UPDATE: Fellow Siouxland native / Hawkeye alum Christopher Calandro doesn't have to go back decades for an astonishing image. This photo of him leaping in terpsichorean ecstasy was taken just a few days ago, and sent as a gift for my 5th blog anniversary.
UPDATE: Not all 70's pictures are embarrassing. Darlene Click over at Protein Wisdom sends this evidence of her reign as a majorette at Sonora High in 1972. Quite comely, sez me. Extra points for the sweet dune buggy!
From The Harbor Master, who explains:
"Okay, you represented the carefree "F**k the establishment" attitude of the late 60's and a good part of the 70's. So thought I would send you what "The Future Lounge Lizards of America" (or T-FLLA ... sounds like ... well, TaFlaah) were wearing back in the day (Aug 72) for our Senior yearbook pic. (class o 73) After that, well joined the Navy, discovered rum and Heinlein (not nessesarily in that order)."
Miriam of Miriam's ideas: "Here's one of me, at 13. A few years later I was actually not so bad."
UPDATE: I think it's time to up the ante. Behold your host in college in 1981, deep in reflective morning contemplation, ready to turn in after a typical evening filled with various dreadful unspeakabilities. If you do not immediately understand those rubber balloons and "CO2" cartridges, I am not going to explain.
The young scholar at Christmas amid the accouterments of learning: University of Iowa college-ruled notebook, stack of p0rn, (probably) The Clash on the headphones, bottle of Tanqueray, some sort of baggy on the floor next to a seed tray. Umm, I think that was right before spring corn plantin'. (There still is a statute of limitations, isn't there?)
Barack Obama? That punkass lightweight only dreams he has 30 year old pictures as incriminating as mine. And I got a drawer full of others that are worse. Much, much, much worse.
Come on you chickens, let's see the worst you got. buck-buck-buck-buhcuck!
UPDATE:Who is this mulletacious 1980s wedding singer with the buxom lady from the witness protection program? "KahnBlog" explains:
"Photo of Yours Truly from many years/miles/pounds ago. That would be me there on the right -- the guy with the sable marmot on his head. She on the left would probably prefer to remain anonymous -- and really, can you blame her?"
Via Neil Roberts: "It's lunch time at the Happiest Place On Earth(TM). Sadly, unlike others I cannot claim to have improved since then."
Why is "Correspondent" from Cherry River Blog all angry 'n' stuff in this shot from the seventies? That bitchin' motorcycle should've been enough to cheer him up:
"Okay, here's my candidate photo. While I probably have more embarrassing ones, this one's tops for massacring the dork/cool nexus. The vehicle between the legs is a 1966 Velocette Venom Thruxton 500cc single-cylinder OHV club racer, with the famous 2" sodium-filled exhaust valve."
More on that bike later. Until then, deal with the scowl. grrr!
UPDATE: Bill at Infinity Unbound, and pride of Haddon Township High (NJ) Class of '74, sends the following with a note:
Age 17, 1973. Note the army fatigue jacket. The cig I probably lifted from my Mom's pack of Salems while she napped. I remember catching mild hell from the parental units when the yearbook came out but, heck, by then I was writing my own notes. A better look at the army fatigues, my signature "look" back then, such as it was:
dxturner of Arguing With a Fencepost adds:
Wow! We are probably the only two guys ever photographed flaunting the Playboy! ... or maybe not.
I especially like the one of young Dexter clinging to his security blanket and security bourbon. Kids are so cute at that age!
Ah. Mah. Gah. I think we may have a winner: Eric Scheie at Classical Values sends this awesome self-pic, redolent of the Glam / Rocky Horror / L-O-L-A Lola / Walk-on-the-Wild-Side side of the 70s. Some of us got into drag racing, some of us just got into drag.
Joe Skilton once knew how to rock the Fu, as this awesome picture attest. Joe is a symphony in earth tones as he poses proudly in fron his bitchin' Jensen, circa 1976, somewhere in Oregon. I dig the suit but I'd rather see him wearing one of those "Free Mustache Rides" iron-on mall t-shirts.
