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» Wednesday from Conservative Cat
Alliance of Free Blogs: Car-Bomb Bumper Sticker Roundup Dog's Daze: Exercise Spark it Up: Blond Scrappleface: Condi Rice to Tour 'Hostile Democracies' Terriorists: 10 Things Scheiss Weekly: Welcome to the Matrix Iowa Hawk: The Big Snooze... [Read More]

» Freeper Sleuth "Buckhead" Celebrates Rather Knockout from Ace of Spades HQ
Free Republic usually only posts excerpts, but here they've published the whole damn article (which otherwise requires annoying registration). Buckhead, of course, wrote that first post questioning the fonts and proportional spacing in Dan's Dodgy Docu... [Read More]

» Oh What A Beautiful Morning from Slarrow
It's nice to wake up to something like this from Iowahawk. What a fitting sendoff. [Read More]

» The Ultimate Whodunnit from Transterrestrial Musings
Iowahawk has a tribute to Dan Rather--the final chapter of the career of Inspector Dan: Luckily, the tubby guard at... [Read More]

» Catching my eye: morning A through Z (in progress) from The Glittering Eye
Here's what's caugh my eye this morning: Iowahawk puts "30" to his series of Detective Dan Rather stories. In progress…... [Read More]

» http://www.basilsblog.net/2005/03/try_one_of_thes_1.html from basil's blog
Try one of these specials with your lunch. It's a Rather-Full menu today. Barking Moonbat Early Warning System has a cartoon. Eyes On The Ball News serenades us with a song. Hog On Ice has a cartoon. Iowahawk has an [Read More]

» Thursday Lunch: Rather Good from basil's blog
Try one of these specials with your lunch. It's a Rather-Full menu today. Barking Moonbat Early Warning System has a cartoon. Eyes On The Ball News serenades us with a song. Hog On Ice has a cartoon. Iowahawk has an [Read More]

» Catching my eye: morning A through Z (in progress) from The Glittering Eye
Here's what's caugh my eye this morning: Iowahawk puts "30" to his series of Detective Dan Rather stories. Tyler Cowen of Marginal Revolution tells us that Australians are the world's champs when it comes to sleeping. Of course, if my... [Read More]

» http://WWW.JESSICASWELL.COM/MT/archives/001939.html from Jessica's Well
Fine. Everybody can crow about Dan Rather's humiliating climbdown yesterday, but there is a real downside to an event like this when a once powerful and trusted high priest of information is brought low by pajama-wearing rubes with computers. And... [Read More]

» Mockery Can be Fun from The Daily Brief: Just Because No One Understands You Doesn't Mean You're An Artist!
While I agree with Kevin that it's best to let the newly-retired anchorman fade quietly into the woodwork, I can still enjoy a wee bit of mockery. Especially when it's cleverly presented. Iowahawk gives us the final story in his "Detective Dan R... [Read More]

» Iowahawks Rather Funny Article from Epoch3 Blog
I knew it wouldn't be long before Iowahawk skewered the departing Dan Rather. Take a look at the Big Snooze written in traditional hard-nosed detective thriller style. You have to read it until the end to know the startling ending... Courage Da... [Read More]

» Catching my eye: morning A through Z (in progress) from The Glittering Eye
Here's what's caugh my eye this morning: Iowahawk puts "30" to his series of Detective Dan Rather stories. Tyler Cowen of Marginal Revolution tells us that Australians are the world's champs when it comes to sleeping. Of course, if my... [Read More]

» Catching my eye: morning A through Z (in progress) from The Glittering Eye
Here's what's caugh my eye this morning: Iowahawk puts "30" to his series of Detective Dan Rather stories. Tyler Cowen of Marginal Revolution tells us that Australians are the world's champs when it comes to sleeping. Of course, if my... [Read More]

» Catching my eye: morning A through Z (in progress) from The Glittering Eye
Here's what's caugh my eye this morning: Iowahawk puts "30" to his series of Detective Dan Rather stories. Tyler Cowen of Marginal Revolution tells us that Australians are the world's champs when it comes to sleeping. Of course, if my... [Read More]

» Damn but I'm slow from Kadnine
I was going to write a hysterically funny satire about Dan Rather's farewell special last night but iowahawk has already got the scoop. Envious? I'm greener than a frog without sidepockets! [Read More]

» His name's is Rather. And he's a dick. from E-nough!
The door to the abandoned Texas Air National Guard office building moaned as I edged it open. My heart was pounding wildly, because I knew I was moments from the answer -- the answer that tied all the loose ends... [Read More]

» His name's is Rather. And he's a dick. from E-nough!
The door to the abandoned Texas Air National Guard office building moaned as I edged it open. My heart was pounding wildly, because I knew I was moments from the answer -- the answer that tied all the loose ends... [Read More]

» iowahawk: The Big Snooze from white pebble
iMy name is Rather. And I'm a dick.... [Read More]

» Iowahawk Gives Us from Little Miss Attila
. . . the final installment of the Dan Rather mystery, with quite a surprise ending. It's masterful. (Of course, if Rather travelled to L.A., he really should have run into a short, buxom blogger with a Glock .40. That... [Read More]

» Get A Life from triticale - the wheat / rye guy
Fargo Jimmie tossed out a link to the Amazon page for the book from which his pint-sized moll is teaching herself to read. The reviewer who took the opportunity to make snide remarks about The Hobbit was just being a... [Read More]

» anthology: the big snooze from Bill Peschel
Revenge is a dish best served cool, the Spanish saying says, and Iowahawk drops the big one on Dangerous Dan Rather in this Chandler-esque parody starring several notable bloggers. It [Read More]

» Iowahawk: The Big Snooze from Disposable Wisdom
Grand send off to Doger Dan where all is revealed [Read More]

Comments

Bill Spurlock

Re: The Big Snooze

I offer this to Detective Dan: Courage!

pajamazon

So late on the post. First time here. I've read the last two pieces and am still laughing! This is the funniest stuff I've read in years. I'll be back!

Greg

Bravo, Iowahawk! Your talents are wasted on us mere mortals.

Stephen Dawson

To the first commenter, EBCDIC is not old-fashioned for ASCII. It was the IBM character set, in which the letters were mapped to different hexadecimal numbers to the mapping used for ASCII. Happily it has pretty well disappeared these days.

Quilly Mammoth

Okay, Pratchett...what'd ya do with the Iowahawk!

"I wiped off the seat of my coat and got in my car." Great set up and delivery. The bit with Gnat precious. Well done again, Iowahawk.

By the way, I sent you all my credit card information for the Bloggonetrix™ "Getting Instant Wealth By Blogging Good" program and while there are some charges being rung up on my card I have yet to receive the program. And I still don't understand why you needed my social security information.

Best,
QM

J.M. Heinrichs

1981 vice 1984.
?

Cheers
JMH

Bob Meyers

Of course, Uncle Walter.

You've done it again. Very funny.

Nick

I thought 'Farewell, My Producer' was the cat's pajamas until this. meshugganah mystery mensch. Perhaps it is not the final Dan Rather mystery. Perhaps he will survive to investigate 'Hilary Clinton - The Mystery of the Missing Liberal.'

Dark Mech

Holy jumpin' catfish! What frequency were you listening to, Kenneth?

Pretty ding dang funny...

Biff Baxter

C'mon. Everyone knows you don't go down 57th St. You go across.

Some people...

Otherwise, well done, hophead.

big dirigible

I like the appearance - and semi-catastrophic disappearance - of the Hudson Eight, particulaly.

Yehudit

"the seedy West 80's flop house I call home."

hahahahahaha.

Yeah, right. Try $2000/mo. for a studio apartment in an unrenovated building.

Amazed

So THAT'S why he wished us all 'courage'!

MF

Please make this a book so I can buy it and read it on the airplane.

triticale

I went thru the whole thing twice and never found the subliminal ad for an obscure salad dressing. What gives?

ForNow

I think it was actually a TNR variant TrueType font, with the same character spacing as TNR, and called "Times Roman" (screen name: Times) No, not the Mac version. And it doesn't help Rather a bit. It's not Word's default font but it gets around. Some Aussie computer mag seemed to think so too, as mentioned in the Wikipedia artile on the Rather-TANG files escapade, but the company went out of business for...some reason...or other....saaaaay, I might have a job for the out-of-work dick. Just don't tell him that it can't vindicate him.

Lambert

Oh, my goodness that was funny! Narcisistic joy for the blogosphere. I betcha Chandler would'va thought Rather deserved it, too.

exguru

"creme de la scum" was also the high point for me.

Ginny

Thanks. This was a joy to read. Thank again.

Dave L

You used the word "lanyard". I love it. How often does one get to use the word "lanyard" except in some boring safety manual?

Talk about putting a lil lumber on it... this one bounced off of quite a few windshields before it landed in the creek.

The Babe Ruth of the blogosphere.

TallDave

*terrible

(by which I meant it's terrible that such genius seems almost commonplace now)

The ending was especially well-done.

TallDave

It's terible, but these are so consistently brilliant I almost take it for granted now.

Thanks for sharing.

Juliette

I worship the keyboard you type on...

Doug in Colorado

Where do I begin...So many princess-cut, full polished, highest grade gems in one post! You have outdone yourself, and that, between you and me, is saying something!

Carridine

That narco-hophead Charlie, and his zoot-suited lizard-lemmings... You have a deft touch with the sledge-hammer of allusion...

jesusland joe

Bob, you know this is funny. Quit being a lame troll and admit that you laughed your ass off when you read this. Even the worst lefty has to admit that this is genius at work. Thanks, Iowahawk, cause this is just damn funny.

Rod Stanton

Fantantic! Brilliant! I do not know enough superlatives to describe this. It is the best Phil Marlow I've read in 50 years. Absolute Genius!

standard deviation

IT'S NOT FUNNY YOU WINGNUTS!! ITS LAME!! STOP LAUGHING AT ME!! MARGARET CHO IS A COMEDY GENIUS!!

Rick

More whiny lib-nut jealousy. See, unlike the humorous Kos and Atrios, Iowahawk *intends* to be funny.

Cordially...

standard deviation

Bob didn't get his nappie this afternoon.

Come on, Iowahawk, make Bob happy. Stop kicking Dan Rather in the nuts and give us some of that hi-brow Lefty humor, like 'Smirky McChimpO'Hitlerburton.'

gymnast

A triumph! 9.85 for Iowahawk and a .05 faceplant for Rather on his last last trick.

Bob Wilson

More strained wingnut 'humor'. Lame beyond belief.

Teem

Brilliant!

jesusland joe

Damn, I thought it was Karl Rove what was behind all of ole Dan's troubles. Walter Cronkite??? Shitttttt......

Sloth

Your description, using predominantly nouns, is so detailed it is scary. If I were DR I'd skip Cali and CJ and take the next train to Iowa.

quiggs

Money couplet:
Three-on-one
Is blogger's fun.

Bwa ha ha.

Mary in LA

[standing up and cheering]
Bravo, sir!!!

Jack Linard

Just brilliant, but I'm greatly saddened that this is the final Insp. Dan rather Mystery.

I'm hoping for a new series featuring an Italian communist female reporter.

Charlie Republican

>> . . . and word on the street was that he fact-checked news articles... just for the sadistic "fun." <<

Oh man, this really slayed me. Keep up the good work!

Andy

"in the sugar bowl..."

hahahahaha


Right Wing Bob

Bury Dan at Black Rock, and inscribe this in letters 6 feet high on the side of the building.

Vitamin Tom

I must build a statue.

I must surround that statue with a shire.

I must enclose that shrine witin a temple.

Inside that temple I shall invite all to worphip at the shrine containing the staute representing the genius of Iowahawk.

Anyone know any sculptors, shrine-makers, archetects, and contractors who'll work for free?

No? Well, nevermind then.

lauraw

'Creme de la scum' is now my go-to bit of slander.
Thank you so much!

DoubleK

"My name is Rather. And I'm a dick."

The laughing (so hard I need a new desk chair) started here and still hasn't stopped. It's been 10 minutes already! This is the funniest post I have come across. Kudos!

Adrian

Perfect ending. Brilliant. Thank you. You shine brighter every day.

From the proud new owner of an Iowahawk stein.

capitano

There's something fishy about that butler, Chalmondeley; I think he's a Pisces, probably working for scale.

diva in training

War Eagle!

More Tennessee jokes, please.

Steve

I haven't laughed that hard in ages. You, sir, are a genius. I tip my hat to you.

Tom Johnson

Please. Please. Please.
PUT A WARNING AT THE TOP OF THESE POSTS!!!

PUT THE COFFEE CUP DOWN!
COVER THE KEYBOARD!

MAKE SURE YOUR CHAIR HAS ARMS SO YOU DO NOT FALL ON THE FLOOR!

please?

By far the funniest post I have seen in the last YEAR!

gord westergard

Shame on you ! I was laughing so hard I woke up everyone in the house.
Brilliant. Please sir, we want more.

John in Tokyo

Genius!

A.R.Yngve

"And that's the way it is."

The Terminator of punchlines. Devastating.

But now, let Dan enjoy his retirement. There are others to mock, other follies to spoof... your work has only begun.

-A.R.Yngve
http://yngve.bravehost.com

Bruce Lewis

" It was Gnat, Fargo Jimmy's pintsized gun moll."

Okay, I just laughed so hard I pissed in my L.L. Bean PJs. Thanks, Iowahawk.

Bruce

fluke_boy

as always - brilliant!

Tim McNabb

Berg - my blog sucks compared to yours. I'm not worthy.

Tim McNabb

bullwinkle

I think this is your best work yet, and that's saying a lot considering how much I've enjoyed everything you've written before. Makes pulling a rabbit out of my hat seem small in comparison. Keep up the good work!

youngin

Back in the 60's Cronkite had a show about the futuristic marvels the 21st Century would bring. One of the most amazing was a typewritter that would _automatically_ center this fancy looking typewritten script. I wasn't impressed at the time because it was nearly useless for ascii art (or ebcdic as they called it back then).

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