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Am I too late? What in the goddamm hell are you people talking about?


Great stuff.


Don't find it funny- and find it frightening that my son does find it so hysterical. Why not just become Saudi Arabia or China and execute kids- you can't seriously think executing children is a good thing simply because murder is so horrendous---- what kind of reasoning is that?

Dave J

Funninest thing I've read in a while...since the Hunter Thompson Scooby-Doo episode, actually.

Legal pedantry:

"The only foreign law that should be considered is British common law as established before July 4, 1776."

There's no such thing as "British" common law. That's ENGLISH common law. The Scots have separate law and seperate courts they were allowed to keep under the terms of the 1707 Act of Union that created the UK. Scots private law is civil law, like on the Continent, although uncodified and with heavy common-law influences: since Scots criminal, administrative and procedural law is the public law of the UK, this makes Scotland, together with Louisiana, Quebec, Puertor Rico, South Africa, Israel and Sri Lanka one of the world's mixed jurisdictions.

And people said going to law school in New Orleans would be unproductive? ;-)


Two points:

1) How do I go about non-diseasing an ox?

2) Regardless of existing precedent, everyone was totally stoned at the one gay wedding I attended.

ARC: StWendeler

You HAVE to send this to that whiny Stephen Breyer... Who got schooled by Scalia in their little discussion on this matter. What a bunch of tools we have in black robes.


Here's the WSJ take on the matter:



Awesome. Iowahawk clubbed the Supremes with logic like I club baby seals for breakfast. Delicious!


Brilliant! Hilarious!


This just in:

Overturning a three judge panel, the Supreme Court has just installed Clay Aiken as the Next American Idol.


Professor Tribe has Missouri dowry custom completely wrong. Shocks for a Trans Am? Pshaw! The market price - er - dowry for a bride currently stands at 2 cases of Sudafed 30-packs, 25 cans of Drano, 1 case of Heet and a Coleman camp stove.

And a drum of anhydrous ammonia if she's really really hot - like Britanny Spears hot. Hey, it ain't easy tappin' a tank of anhydrous ammonia at 3 am without gettin' "the vapors", as they call AA poisoning 'round these parts. We've got our standards.


Another great item by Iowahawk. As a DC lawyer I know this one is right on the mark. And the guy who posted above about British Common Law in 1776 is right -- except technically, for cases involving the US Constitution, the U.S. court decisions pick 1789, the year the Consitution was adopted.


My brain cells came back with a 5-4 decision:

You have one Awesome blog!! Keep up the good work.


Son of a Pig and a Monkey

This just in:

SCOTUS has, based on a review of Sudanese law, concluded that Thirteenth Amendment (abolition of slavery) is unconstitutional.

Okay Remus, give back the 25 acres and the mule and come on in here...


That was damn funny.


The only foreign law that should be considered is British common law as established before July 4, 1776. If any in congress had a spine or balls, the constitution would be invoke and these courts regulated in the PEOPLE'S house.


I laughed until I cried. Not because the laughing was so extreme as to cause tears to form, but because I realized this is not too far off from reality...


Oh my goodness, that was funny.

John Tabin

In another civil finding, the Court noted prevailing Nepalese-Canadian-Yemeni standards in opening the way for legalized stonings at arranged gay marriages.

Frickin' brilliant.


I tried to laugh. But this one scared me too much. I realised today that we could defeat the Krauts, the Ruskies, and the A-rabs and STILL end up committing national suicide via our own corrupted institutions. God Have mercy

Bubba James

Hell, I married my Rhode Island Red hen and alls I got was a big dose of clucks!

half-vast conspirator

Truth IS stranger fiction, I s'pose.
The death penalty provided me with the comfort of knowing I would not have to exact revenge should someone, say, murder my daughter. Now I'll have to have the prepubescent punk next door do the job. "Vengence is mine!" sayeth the lad.

Al Maviva

Hey, lay off Justice Kennedy. Every Justice has to be free to mature in office, to discover his own humanity and to define for himself the mystery of international law trends used as normative factors in Constitutional law.


Expanding on Jack's point:
The ABA thinks 12 year olds are competent to be involved in deciding the fate of a life.

The ABA thinks 17.99 year olds are not competent.

What I want to know is if the zoning restrictions I'm under are Constitutional - I can't have 3 cows in my house, and that seems to forbid me from marrying.


Good point, Jack. This post was well done, 'Hawk.


In breaking news, the U.S. Supreme Court has declared the Declaration of Independence unconstitutional, as it includes references to "Nature's God" as well as a "Creator".

Jack Linard

Isn't it interesting that the death penalty is legal for those aged 0 years minus a few weeks even though they have not harmed anyone, but it is now illegal for for those aged 18 years minus a few weeks even though they have plundered, murdered and gang-raped their way across 3 states.

Raving Norseman

Brilliant. I base that comment on the fact that I am a self-professed second-rate intellect, and it took me a moment to catch on to the point.


Way too good. Where's the Paypal button?

Write Winger


In a scathing and sometimes caustic dissent, Judge Antonin Scalia wrote that "Holy. Freakin'. Shit."


You are officially at the top of my daily blog run.


I always suspected the courts would rule themselves unconstitutional! Although I figured they would rule the constitution unconstitutional first.


I hope that you're saving these somewhere, Iowahawk, on your hard-drive, on CDs, on floppy discs, printed out and buried underground in fireproof boxes in several locations over four continents, whatever, just I hope they're all safe for posterity. Are you coming out with a book? Anything?


I think you should lay off Justice Kennedy.

These issues are obviously beyond the power and ability of the various state legislatures to resolve on their own. So if we didn't want him making decisions like this, we shouldn't have elected him.

Anselmo Cardinal Trentino

Is this true?

How come I didn't see this on Drudge?

Blue Chip

Way too funny! I love "terminate prisoners as "extremely late-term abortions" under Roe v. Wade." My computer screen has diet sprite all over it!


And I just fixin to move to Missouri so I could git some new shocks for my Trans Am.



WTF?? I wanted 10 cows, not 3 oxen! Lousy Kennedy disappoints me again.

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